So this morning, my friend Sandra and I were discussing our mommy farmer tans while on the elliptical. Sandra brought up that she might hit a tanning bed to even out her tan. Our conversation went like this...
S "I think I may have to hit a tanning salon to even out this tan."
H "Really, I am so white at this point, there really isn't any hope."
S "Aren't you Italian ? You should tan nicely."
H "I am also part Native American, but my mother was pale white with freckles, and blue eyes. Not much Native American showing up over here."
S "I bet you would tan nicely if you tried. I need to even this out, and I would feel ridiculous laying out in the back yard. You know..tanned fat looks better than white fat."
H "Agreed, however, cancerous fat does NOT look better, and more than one person in my pale family has had cancerous lesions removed."
S "So, you are totally against tanning beds??"
H "Let's be honest, I am not anal with the sunscreen like I should be, but I spray my poor translucent kids down with sunscreen all summer long. I should use more, and I will be self conscious when Missy's wedding comes around due to the strapless dresses, but what can you do?? Besides, tanning beds fall into self maintenance. I have an inch and half of gray roots, and I haven't had a pedicure in a year. What makes you think we have time for a tanning bed?"
S "True..."
H "Besides...the sun is free, I refuse to pay for sunlight :)"
PS...I know we shouldn't be able to have that whole conversation while on the elliptical...We should be out of breath and unable to chat. But today, today was a slow day. At least we made it to the gym.
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